Every cloud has a silver lining. For non-Obamatons this election could also have one. On the History channel is a program titled, “Doomsday 2012: The End of Days.” An episode of “Decoding the Past,” it predicts, you guess it, the end of the world in 2012, specifically December 21st. So, how could Earth’s end hold anything good for those individuals not under the spell of Obama-mania?
Well, at least it won’t happen on a Republican’s watch. Barack Obama, head honcho of the office of the president-elect (whatever that is), will either be the US president or “Lord of the Universe” by then. No doubt, Democrats will still be blaming Bush, still aimlessly proclaiming that he wrecked the world so much even Obama, the messiah, couldn’t fix it.
Even though Obama will have had almost 4 years and a Democrat congress for at least two, just see them blame Bush for ending all existence. If Republicans were smart, they would purposely lose the 2010 election as well. Then when the world ends, they could hold up their hands and say “Don’t look at us, we weren’t in charge of anything.” They also would have a great campaign slogan for 2012, “Democrat governance led to doomsday, vote Republican.”
Apparently, the convergence of doomsday prophecies is overwhelming or at least enough to make an hour-long program. There’s the ancient Mayan calendar, which finishes precisely in the year 2012. Those Mayans no wonder their civilization collapsed over 1000 years ago, they just didn’t plan enough ahead.
However, in addition to the “chronologically challenged” Mayans were also the medieval meditations of Merlin, who apparently concocted more than just potions, and the Chinese oracle of the I Ching. The program also included John in the Book of Revelation. Although the Bible has a slight disqualification, it tells that the exact time of Armageddon cannot be known beforehand.
But those other soothsayers haven’t this limitation and unbeknownst to each other have concluded the same conclusion, or at least interpreters have made the same coincidental interpretation without collusion to at least obtain this same conclusion. “The end is near, 2012 to be exact.” Couldn’t these guys have predicted something a little more useful, like when the stock market was going to rebound?
Yet, there’s more. St. Malachy, Irish Bishop and seedy seer if there ever was one, predicted the last pope. Less known but more pertinent to modern living is that he also foresaw when the last beer would be brewed. In actuality, he produced a list of all the popes that would be pooped out starting in 1143 with Pope Celestine II. All and all, he listed 112 popes. Pope John II who died in 2005 was the 110th.
The current one, the 111th, is Pope Benedict XVI, and he’s very old. Though 40 is the new 20 and 60 is the new 40, the eighties are still not a decade of rejuvenated spring chickens. So, Benedict’s days are very short, and there’s supposedly only one more pope, Peter the Roman, remaining.
During his reign Rome will be destroyed, which definitely wouldn’t be a good day for anyone who happens to be there at the time. Vacation packages to Italy in 2013 could very well become like buying really cheap Florida swampland. Still, it certainly within the realm of possibility that 2012 may just have the last pope reigning even if there’s not much left to reign over.
At the end of Malachy’s prophetic list is “Finis” or simply “The end.” No explanation is given afterwards. For all anybody knows, it could be just the end of his list, or it could be actually the finality of everything sort of the end of everybody’s list. For a seer of seers Malachy could have been a little more specific at what happens at “The End.” I mean do credits roll after a roaring lion or what.
And no doomsday convergence prophecy would be complete unless Nostradamus, a practitioner of medicine and part-time prophet provocateur from Provencale, France, weren’t mentioned. His quatrains of questionable quandary were published in 1555. Though these quatrains have been criticised as ramblings obtained under demonic influence, it’s under good authority his head never did a complete 360 like in the movie, “The Exorcist.”
In the past, there have been those soothsayers of doom who have foretold the end only to see their prediction come to naught. They’ve almost become like the boy who cried wolf too many times. When the wolf finally came, no one believed him. But with such convergence of gloomy predictions, it’s almost impossible not to believe. Yeah, there’ll still be those “doomsday deniers” who will continue to plan beyond 2012, but they will be ruthlessly ridiculed, at least until 2013 arrives
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